Merrill reads a classic piece from her book, How to Be Hap-Hap-Happy Like Me, about attending a sales convention. Then she proposes her own anti-sales program.

MERRILL MARKOE is an Emmy-award winning TV writer (Late Night with David Letterman, TV Nation) and prolific author of books, including What the Dogs Taught Me, How to Be Hap-Hap-Happy Like Me, Merrill Markoe's Guide to Love, The Psycho Ex Game, and Walking in Circles Before Lying Down.

This piece was recorded at Un-Cabaret's spoken-word series "Say the Word", featuring great comedy writers reading their own original first-person non-fiction.