Eighteen months after suddenly losing the love of my life, I’m coming out of the fog of early grief and taking a hard look at the rest of my life. With three young children to care for on my own while also managing their grief, I haven’t had a lot of time to ponder what’s next for me. When I think about what I really want, I keep coming back to one thing. Or I should say one person—someone who understands what I’ve been through because he’s been there too, only his losses were far worse than mine. I find myself thinking about him all the time, but is he ready for the things I want? I have no idea, but I’m determined to find out.