My housemate Carl’s friend Greg is at the house fixing our heating system, but no-one told me a thing about it. I’m curled up in bed when the moment takes me and I decide to have some early-morning naughty fun. When Greg bursts into my room to check the floor duct he’s met with a sight that makes his mouth water: his friend’s dirty housemate with a toy inside. He can’t take his eyes off me and I encourage him over, dining out on the sudden attention.

Soon Carl’s at the door and seems just as curious as all of us. Hear how I treat them both!